Is all that I have
Take me in
No questions asked
You strip away the ugliness
that surrounds me
Are you an angel?
Am I already that gone?
I only hope that I won't disappoint you
I'm down here on my knees
Is all that I have
- Sarah McLachlan
Pacey glanced out his window and sighed. It had been a week since he had broke up with Andie.
Since he had broke up with Andie
It had been the hardest thing that he ever had to do... and he wished to hell that he could take it back. But he couldn’t. Just like she couldn’t take away the hurt he felt. Pacey knew a part of him died the minute he said the words...Those words that rang in his head over a million times a day. "Andie we need to talk.."
If only he could go back in time, and take the words back. If only he had knew what she was going to tell him that night. He would have never told her the things he did. In fact, the only reason he had even brought up the idea of them going their separate ways was because of the depression. He had been with Andie thru thick and thin. He was there, but she wasn’t there for him. It took two people to make a relationship.
God damn it why did things have to go this way? he wondered to himself slamming his hand against the wall. Taking a quick glance at the clock, Pacey sighed, and raked a hand thru his hair. It was only 10pm on Friday night. Everyone would still be up. Everyone including Andie.
Taking a chance, Pacey picked up the phone on the nightstand next to him, and punched in seven digits. A slight smile came over his face at the voice who answered the phone.
"We need to talk Andie..."
He heard a slight chuckle on the other end and winced.
"We need to talk...let’s see. Last time I heard those words, I had the guy I loved most in the whole world break up with me, he told me that he I needed some time alone to figure out my ‘problem’....oh and get this Pacey. It was you!"
"Andie...Please. Let me explain.."
"No! No, you know what? I don’t have to let you explain anymore Pacey. You were my boyfriend. You were supposed to support me on my ‘problem’. But you, instead, chose to dump me. Thanks a lot." *click*
Pacey bit slightly at his lip and nodded. He hadn’t thought about anything besides himself when he had told her those things. He just wanted the best for her. Quietly he placed the phone back in it’s cradle. And holding his head in his hands, Pacey Witter started to cry.
"Practical Magic or Urban Legends."
"Eww what is it Dawson? Scary movie night?"
"Jo, these aren’t scary compared to half of the stuff we have seen."
"Who said I ever actually watched those movies with you?" Jo added coyly.
Dawson smirked and popped in Practical Magic. "You’ll like this one, it’s a total chick-flick"
Jo jabbed Dawson in the side with her elbow. "Us ‘chicks’ don’t always like the same ‘flicks’ Dawson."
Joey smiled as Dawson shrugged and pressed play on the VCR. Joey snuggled up against the backboard of Dawson’s bed, in ‘her’ spot and everything. Inside, she laughed as Dawson quickly returned to the bed, making sure not to miss any previews.
Joey tried to shift her attention to the previews also...but failed. She could do anything right now -- anything but watch a movie.
She hated the thought of telling Dawson that their tradition of movie night would be ruined because she didn’t want to. So despite her feelings, she had went. And now, here she was, watching Sandra Bullock kill men that fell in love with her. No matter how interesting this was...Joey couldn’t keep focused. Too many bad things had happened this week. Things that Dawson wasn’t even worrying about. She kept thinking about Andie and Pacey. Poor Andie. It was enough to have found out her brother was gay...did Pacey really have to pick now to leave her? She really didn’t and couldn’t understand him.
There...She thought smiling. There’s my excuse to get out.
"Hey Dawson...I have to go. I just remembered I had to work late shift at the Icehouse tonight for Bess. You don’t mind do you?"
"No Jo, it’s ok. See you tomorrow." Dawson replied, keeping his eyes glued to the movie.
"k, thanks. See ya."
With that Joey climbed out of his window, and headed over to Pacey’s...
It was questioning time.
Pacey fumbled around in the kitchen. "Where’s the god damn turkey?" Mumbling more to himself, he ravaged around in the refrigerator until he discovered the meat. Without any care he pulled three pieces out and threw them on the piece of bread he was holding. Folding the bread in half he took a bite. He was trying so hard not to think about Andie -- and he wasn’t succeeding.
Changing the subject Pacey remembered that he could eat where ever he wanted, considering Doug nor his father were home. Taking joy in that Pacey brought his sandwich into the living room and turned on the television. Towards the last bite of his sandwich and and halfway thru an old ‘Friends’ rerun there was a knock at the door. Shoving the last bite of his sandwich he mumbled what he could out of "Coming".
The pound on the door grew harder and louder, "I’m COMING" Pacey yelled.
Swinging the door open he found himself face to face with Joey Potter.
"Well Well, if it isn’t Ms. Josephine Potter." He welcomed her in and slammed the door shut. Turning and walking back to the living room he mumbled, just loud enough for her to hear "To what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?"
Joey smirked and followed him into the living room. She continued yelling as Pacey sunk into the nearby couch.
"Why did you leave her Pacey? I thought you really were shaping up, I thought you had found your someone. But I guess not, you had to screw it up like you do to everything else."
"God Joey, like you should be one to talk. At least my other half didn’t turn out to be Gay."
"Back Up...What kind of comeback is ‘at least my other half didn’t turn out Gay?’ And besides Pacey, we’re not talking about me. We’re talking about you"
Sensing a slight pain on his face, Joey eased up. "Look, I just came over here to ask What was going on between you and Andie. She ...and you...seem so depressed lately. You really should talk to her."
"I tried, and what would you care even if I didn’t? You just proved to both you and me that you don’t."
Joey hesitated, and moved her glare to the floor. "I...I know. I’m sorry. I just, ever since Dawson...Since he got back together with Jen I , I just hate the whole break up thing...no matter who it is. "
"Jo, You have to move on...Dawson’s with Jen now an---"
"Whoa Pace, remember this isn’t about me. It’s about you. Do you ...wanna talk about it?"
Joey shifted her eyes back to meet with Pacey’s, letting a small smile slip out. Pacey didn’t smile, but he did reply. "No...Not tonight."
Joey’s smile slowly disappeared and she headed back towards the door. "Ok, I ’ll talk to you tomorrow." Pacey got up and went after her. Grabbing her by the arm he tried his best to smile.
"Jo, I said I didn’t want to talk today..."
"Yeah I know," she mumbled, "That’s why I’m leaving"
"Wait...Just another minute or so."
Joey stood silently, wondering what Pacey had up his sleeve. She waited a few minutes, then looked at Pacey and started to ask him why she was still here, but before she could open her mouth to speak the old grandfather clock in the Witter living room struck 12. Pacey nodded towards the clock. "It’s tomorrow now...And if it’s ok...I’d like to talk."
Joey smiled and nodded as Pacey led her back into the living room.
"So wait a minute here, you mean to tell me that she just told you about her depression? Is that why you left her Pacey?" Joey thwaped him with the throw pillow that she had lying in her lap. Defending himself as best as he could Pacey put in his word, "No! No way, It’s not why Jo, but it’ s part of the why."
"So what’s the why?"
"I didn’t feel like she was in love with me anymore...All we did was fight, like I said before. We couldn’t go out on a date without breaking up at least once. I’ve tried to patch things up Joey, but it’s...impossible"
"Nothing is impossible Pacey."
"I’m slowly beginning to believe that..." Pacey said with a smile.
It was now 2:30am. They had been practically rivals, Joey and Pacey that is...But now. After just these short 2 and a half hours of talking... He felt closer to her than anyone he had ever known. Besides Andie...But Andie was quickly falling out of Pacey’s mind. No matter how much he tried to resist it.
Joey was taking over Andie’s old place in his heart.